Nazis, Vampires, Nudity and the Caribbean

So the call comes in:

“Can you write a treatment for a sexy vampire film? There’s a Caribbean location, some Nazi costumes and a UK country mansion – mix in some nudity and we need it immediately.”

That’s a pretty specific brief, not something I have knocking around. Not even an idea I’ve ever really thought about before.

Well, not in public anyway.

Hmm, Caribbean Nazi Vampires?

Sexy Caribbean Nazi Vampires?

Who retire to a UK country mansion?

No.

Naked Nazis attacked on a Caribbean island by Vampires looking to invest in a UK country mansion?

No, nearly there but not quite right.

Caribbean Vampires who join the Nazi party in order to set up a nudist camp in a UK country mansion.

Now you’re talking!

One treatment coming up, this puppy practically writes itself.*

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*It didn’t write itself, I wrote it. It was quite difficult.

7 Responses to “Nazis, Vampires, Nudity and the Caribbean”

  1. Piers Says:

    Dammit. I want phone calls like that.

  2. phillbarron Says:

    As fun as it is, it can’t quite match the one I hope comes next:

    ” That’s great, have some money.”

  3. Jason Arnopp Says:

    One day, all calls to Arnopp Towers will be of the “Shit! We need a slasher flick where the killer’s ten feet tall, speaks Flemish and can fire laser beams from his cock!” variety….

  4. phillbarron Says:

    Have you been reading my mail?

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