Bad reviews

Someone posted this review of ‘The Evolved’ over on Amazon:

“The description of this sounded good, anyway, too bad the movie is about negative 50 on a scale of 1 to 5, with one being the lowest, so that’s how I rated it. Strictly amateur hour stuff, with horrible acting, horrible effects, a lame plot, and SUPER DUPER bad production values. And yes I know that’s what made Troma great. Or that’s what THEY say, anyway. This reminded me of another terrible British flick I saw a few years ago called “Zombie Toxin” but none of the names seem to tie these together. Had I been in any way connected with “Zombie Toxin” I’d go under another name for the rest of my life to avoid detection, too, but I swear there’s certain people in Evolved that were also in that other travesty. Anyway, this can safely be avoided unless you do a lot of drugs that keep you immobile for long periods of time and you need something to focus on, otherwise, stay the hell away.”

I don’t know why, but I love bad reviews. Variety gave us a much worse review than this, which I thought it was great. I always thought I’d get upset about being slagged off, but I don’t. Weird.

I suppose it helps to sit in an auditorium with a paying audience. The film sold out every time it’s been screened and people laughed all the way through, so it can’t be that bad. Can it?

Apparently so. -50 on a scale of 1 to 5.

You have been warned.

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Categories: Sad Bastard | 2 Comments

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2 thoughts on “Bad reviews

  1. The Moviequill

    hunt down the Washington Post’s review of Hilary Swank’s new flic, The Reaping… they sliced it to pieces

  2. Hmm, not good. I’d probably be upset by that one; but ‘The Evolved’ set out to be a Troma film, it was never meant to be a work of art.

    If I’d written a script which attracted Hilary Swank, I’d be upset if the movie turned out to be a pile of shit.

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