I’ve finally finished the script I’ve been avoiding working on since September.

Not deliberately avoiding, just getting side tracked with other projects. I really must learn to say no occasionally.

Anyway, it’s done now and what a pain in the arse the last few pages were. Story wise it was fine, but the characters keep swapping bodies which makes it bastard hard to identify them on the page. On screen it’ll be obvious …

Hmm …

On screen I hope it’ll be obvious who’s who. Which you can also read as ‘I hopethe script makes it as far as the screen’ – nothing’s certain in this crazy old world.

So a character who starts out as Bob, ends up in Mabel’s body*. Do you label that as:


It’s a mine field. Especially if Mabel then ends up in Bob’s body and you have:




Doesn’t exactly paint a clear mental image, does it?

In the end I did a mixture of everything and then reinforced it with lots of action which referred to Bob’s feminine hands or Mabel’s hairy back. But then I had to write a new scene where


locked himself (herself) in the toilet while


banged on the door shouting:

"Stop playing with my tits."

For an hour.

Then it got really complicated when Bob and Mabel ended up inside the same body. At which point I just killed everyone and called it a day.

Bob and Mabel are fucking dead, it's over.

So there we are. One script down for the Easter bonanza – two more to go.

Tomorrow holds two meetings in store: one about final notes for ’til Death and the other about … I don’t know. It’s a mystery meeting where, according to the producer, he has to be looking me in the eyes when he tells me what it’s about. HAS TO. There is no other option and apparently I’ll shit a solid gold brick with excitement.

Which will be lovely.

I must remember to take a change of underwear.

* Names changed to protect the pointless.

Categories: Progress, til Death | 9 Comments

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9 thoughts on “Hooray

  1. I would just say in the directions that Bob is inside Mabel and carry on as Mabel talking. The actress stays the same. I would also have a knob gag, but that’s what I said about Schindler’s List.

  2. I was going to say that … except the bit about the knob joke.

    Good luck at the mystery meet.

  3. Darren

    Can I have the gold brick, if you don’t want it?

  4. CNUTS + Adaddinsane: it gets more complicated when you start writing a mixture of dialogue and action – Mabel shouts “Mabel, look out!” Bob dives out of the way just as a machine gun toting elephant …

    The aim at this stage is to make it easy for the reader, not the actors. Plus, some people never read the action lines.

    Darren: No.

  5. Interesting. Not sure how Grant & Naylor did it for the Bodyswap epsisode of Red Dwarf. Might be interesting to compare.

  6. There’s a script online – whether it’s a transcript from the original script or from watching the TV series is unclear, but it uses the personality’s name rather than the body’s name.

    Confusingly though, Lister waves Rimmer’s fingers and vice versa.

  7. So, the meeting … Did he propose?

    Are you allowed to tell?

    Are you scarred for life?

    What happened!

  8. Pingback: Spinning plates « The Jobbing Scriptwriter

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