Fucking about

Today is a working day, so naturally I had a nice long lie in, got up late and immediately got straight down to breakfast.

Breakfast was a leisurely affair and by the time I’d finished it was nearly lunch time, so I just rolled straight into the next meal because you have to keep your energy up, don’t you?

Of course, after having two big meals right next to each other, I needed a little lie down … which became a fairly long lie down – but that’s okay, because all sleeping time is actually thinking time and can be written off against tax.

Thoroughly refreshed, I jumped up, showered, had a cup of tea and was sitting at my desk within the hour (not the same hour, but within an hour), ready and raring to browse the Internet for a bit.

Let’s be fair here, I’m not completely work-shy. I have opened Final Draft and it’s been staring mournfully at me from the taskbar all afternoon.

Hours later and I’ve run out of things to do (apart from actually doing some writing) I’ve voraciously checked emails, I’ve read blogs, watched cats hurting themselves on YouTube, checked my emails, posted deliberately inflammatory messages on message boards in the hope of annoying homeopaths, Christians, creationists, holocaust deniers, conspiracy theorists and anyone else I think I can get a rise out of (but they’re not biting today) and checked my emails again, just in case I missed one.

Short of actually replying to people offering me drugs, weight loss, weight gain in a specific and private area, discount software, sex, beat-the-casino-systems and other random things designed to empty my bank account – I might actually have to do some work!

Gasp!

And then I thought, no. I’ll write this blog post instead.

And now I have … it’s definitely time for tea and biscuits.